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Old 04-06-2015, 10:07 AM   #1
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Default Meanwhile in Australia .

Quote:
Northern Territory police have been left perplexed by a man who was
spotted directing peak-hour traffic with a bag of frozen peas on one
of Darwin's busiest roads.
Quote:
However the man fled, peas in hand, and was not found by police.
Quote:
Territorians wrote on the NT Police Facebook page urging officers to
"give peas a chance", with one asking whether the man could end up in
"the can" if arrested.
Yup the police in Darwin have a tough job . There 70 thousand
males in Darwin and IMO anyone of them is a likely to stand in the
middle of road directing traffic with frozen peas .


Source
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Old 04-06-2015, 10:08 AM   #2
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But did he do a good job?
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Old 04-06-2015, 09:42 PM   #3
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Inspector Plod and his merry men do it again .....

Quote:
Authorities are searching the Gold Coast after a South American boa constrictor
was released by Queensland police officers who wrongly believed it was a harmless python.

Police were called to The Esplanade at Surfers Paradise on or about March 26 to
respond to reports of a large snake spotted at the base of a tree on a footpath.
Oh wait , the boys in blue have got it covered ...
Quote:
"It won't be too long until a member of the public stumbles across it and
calls one of the authorities and it gets caught quickly."

Source .
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Old 04-10-2015, 07:11 PM   #4
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Last week, the Tax Office issued a draft ruling stating, in very simple terms,
that when you die, you're no longer eligible to receive a pension.
Well I am so glad they sorted that out .

However I am a little worried that it is only a draft ( Provisional ) ruling .
Do Zombies really need the cruelty of so much uncertainty about their incomes .


Reference source


.
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Old 04-11-2015, 10:16 AM   #5
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'Straya!
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Old 05-06-2015, 01:56 PM   #6
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http://www.edmontonsun.com/2015/05/0...ospital-stroll

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Old 06-04-2015, 11:10 AM   #7
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Yesterday I laughed, this morning a Canadian brethren showed solidarity


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Old 06-04-2015, 04:09 PM   #8
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Climate Change is FAKE NEWS
 
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Old 08-04-2015, 04:48 PM   #9
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Quote:

Quote:
Number of Australian men arrested in 2015 for playing a trumpet while driving: one (to date).
Number of hands needed to play the trumpet: two. Number of hands left over for driving: zero.
Number of Australian dollars the driver will have to pay for careless driving: 354.
Update: Number of minutes spent by me researching trumpet-playing last night: zero.
Number of readers who have already pointed out that it does not take two hands to play
the trumpet: two. Number it actually takes: zero. Chance that the man mentioned above
(who was reportedly swerving all over the road) was this talented: also zero.
Source
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Old 09-03-2015, 05:49 PM   #10
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Default Lost sheep yeilds 30 sweaters worth of fleece



http://www.ctvnews.ca/sci-tech/lost-...eece-1.2545908
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Old 09-03-2015, 11:20 PM   #11
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Meh , all our sheep would look like that if we could afford the
vegemite and beer .

..
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Old 09-04-2015, 12:47 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ross View Post
Meh , all our sheep would look like that if we could afford the
vegemite and beer .

..
Not touching that one with even a 20 ft. pole.

Not even going there.
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Old 09-04-2015, 12:50 AM   #13
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Quote:
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Chris!!!
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Can't leave the Siwwy Wabbit behind!!
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Old 09-16-2015, 02:05 PM   #14
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Old 09-16-2015, 10:44 PM   #15
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They're different down there.
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Old 09-19-2015, 08:45 PM   #16
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Found in a toilet in Townsville, 10 ft. python. He was thirsty.



http://www.cnn.com/2015/09/16/asia/a...ke1pstoryPhoto
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Old 10-22-2015, 09:14 AM   #17
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Our NewZealand neighbors in 2008 ....
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... during a car chase, a trident was flung from one moving car through
the open window of another moving car and lodged in the skull of the driver,
and yet the chase continued......

That story was enhanced by the victim's claim that he didn't feel the
spear ("Justin just said, 'You've got an arrow sticking out of your head,
bro,'"), and by the defendant's position that, while he admitted throwing
the spear into the other car, he denied doing it with "reckless disregard
for the safety of others."



Source
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Old 10-22-2015, 11:28 AM   #18
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Well, I'm glad he wasn't recklessly disregarding anybody's safety!
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Old 10-22-2015, 12:41 PM   #19
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Of Course Australia Has Drop-Off Centers for Deadly Spiders

http://www.wired.com/2015/10/of-cour...eadly-spiders/


The infamous funnel-web spider used to kill people in Australia–
until scientists developed an antivenom. Now there's plenty of the
stuff, thanks to some citizen science. Alamy


Quote:
The wound around the bite site will be excruciating. You’ll salivate uncontrollably like Pavlov’s pups. Your lips will tingle, and your muscles will spasm as your nervous system glitches. The real trouble starts, though, when the venom starts attacking your heart. That organ too will start to spasm, spiking your blood pressure. Fail to reach a hospital in time to get the antivenom, and you’re dead.

You definitely don’t want to get bitten by Australia’s funnel-web spider, which roams Sydney and the country’s east1 coast at large. But those who do—and survive, thanks to that precious antivenom—will have the Australian Reptile Park to thank. Just north of Sydney, it runs a program that asks ordinary citizens to capture Australia’s most venomous spider and take it to one of a dozen drop-off points in the area. Arachnid in hand, technicians can milk its venom and ship the stuff off to a biotech lab, which uses it to manufacture life-saving antivenom.
The rest at Wired.

This should put Fart's mind at ease...
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Old 10-22-2015, 01:19 PM   #20
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It seems to me like some genetically modified disease or parasite to kill them all off might be a good next step.
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Old 10-28-2015, 06:09 AM   #21
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Quote:
Girl, 4, bitten by 'brown' snake while watching TV at home
on western Queensland property
Source

..
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Old 10-28-2015, 10:18 AM   #22
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Aussies slur their words and use only two-thirds of their mouth to speak because early settlers spent most of their days DRUNK, academic says
Quote:
The Australian language developed because early settlers were often drunk
Academic claims the constant slurring of words distorted the accent
The average Australian speaks to just two thirds capacity
The drunken speech has been passed down from generation to generation
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...-settlers.html


Academics say that the Australian accent was formed by
the drunken speech patterns of early settlers who were 'such
big drinkers'



'Australia, it is no longer acceptable to be
smarter than we sound,' said Dean Frenkel,
a communications expert at Victoria
University in Melbourne (pictured)



Winston Churchill (pictured) described the Australian accent as
‘the most brutal maltreatment ever inflicted upon the mother tongue’
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Old 10-28-2015, 05:45 PM   #23
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Australian Household Debt at 134% of GDP now highest in developed
market World .

Tick tick tick ....




Full article here

..
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Old 10-29-2015, 07:04 AM   #24
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Quote:
Aussies slur their words and use only two-thirds of their mouth to speak
because early settlers spent most of their days DRUNK, academic says
Well sorry but we slur our words because we are drunk .

..
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Old 10-29-2015, 10:26 AM   #25
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You don't have to say sorry. You're not a Brit.
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